Have you ever thought about doing a full 180 and changing your life entirely? Well, that’s what I was thinking for the past 3 years. And 2020 was the year when I finally decided to take a risk, step out of my comfort zone and move out of my hometown. I mean my COUNTRY. Back then I had already graduated from university and had a proper job as a news reporter and English tutor. I had no idea how the turn of events was going to change my life, but I was sure that was what I wanted for the moment. I had decided to join the European Solidarity Corps and move to France for a year. As the time of my project was approaching, Covid-19 was spreading its wings all over the planet. It actually became the reason I couldn’t get to France for an entire YEAR. And even tho my experience was not all rainbows and unicorns, I can say now that the waiting was totally worth it. It’s okay if you get to your dream destination and cry yourself to sleep, become anxious, cause you don’t fully speak or understand the language and it’s okay to feel left out, cause you hold a completely different value system and culture within yourself. It’s okay not to feel okay sometimes when you’re far from home. But the best part is to let yourself feel the beauty of the journey you’re going through: all the new friends you make, the international network you create, the stuff that you learn, and the cultures you discover – they are all worth your anxiety. Even though I had chosen a different career path, music had always been my passion through the years. During my volunteering experience, I got to embrace what I had in me as a musical person. I got to learn and perform traditional music from all over the world. I sang in languages I had never even heard. I played the kind of music I had never ever played in my life. Yes, I was feeling awkward in the beginning. From interviewing politicians and producing news to playing traditional music with a bunch of cool people from all over the world: in the beginning, I wasn’t quite getting how my life had changed. I was happy with the changes tho. I was trying to keep up with what was going on, but I was also sure that all I needed was time. And that mindset was what made me fully enjoy my experience rather than spend time trying to fit in. When you’re a volunteer abroad, you have to understand one simple thing – tolerance, patience, and open-mindedness are what you need along the way. The rest is just a matter of time. While in France, I tried to make the full of my stay and traveled to over 10 countries around Europe, participated in various youth exchanges, got to work with kids and pass on what I had learned to them, and, of course, share my Armenian culture.
For a moment I was so caught up in the French lifestyle, that people around me were joking about me being a total “Emily in Paris” cliché French girl. Tho for the sake of truth, I have to confess what I had seen in the series, turned out to be true somehow. Well, at least for me. I remember how in my school years I was dreaming of going to France and seeing what life is like there. Now I’m beyond thankful for this opportunity my volunteering experience gave me. I now get what Charles Aznavour had in mind when he was explaining the feeling of being French and Armenian at the same time. Of course, a year is not enough to feel French, but I guess it depends on how open you are on “absorbing” the new things around you. I think after moving abroad, you sometimes have that identity crisis, where the two parts of you start to battle. The good thing is – you can always find the perfect balance. And that is exactly what I did. I made my soul half French, and still kept the good old Armenian in me.
Nellie Melkonyan
